Funny Poker Jokes

There are plenty of jokes that you can adapt to a bar. Let me share some funny poker jokes. Enjoy the selection of jokes and may laughter be yours.

JOKE 1

Two dog owners were bragging about the intelligence of their pets.

'The brightest dog I ever had,' said one, 'was a Great Dane that could play cards. He was a whiz at poker, but I had him put to sleep.'

'You had him put to sleep, a bright dog like that A dog like that would be worth a million dollars.'

'Had to,' the man replied. 'Caught him using marked cards!'

JOKE 2

A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, 'Martha, pack up your things! I just won the lottery!'

Martha replies, 'Should I pack for warm weather or cold'

The man responds, 'I don't care. Just get out!'

JOKE 3

Rearrange the letters SLOT MACHINES.

Answer CASH LOST IN EM.

JOKE 4

A blackjack dealer and a player with a thirteen count in his hand are arguing about whether or not it's appropriate to tip the dealer.

The player says, 'When I get bad cards, it's not the dealer's fault. Accordingly, when I get good cards, the dealer has nothing to do with it. Why should I tip him'

The dealer says, 'When you eat out, do you tip the waiter'

'Yes,' the player says.

'Well, that's because the waiter serves you food. I serve you cards, so you should tip me.'

'OK,' the player says, 'but the waiter gives me what I ask for'